Empathy Over Ego

People with Alzheimer’s, like my stepmother, often experience confabulations—memories that are significantly altered or entirely fabricated. When this happens, debating the details is rarely productive. Instead, what truly matters is tuning into the emotion beneath the story.

The more I witness this, the more I realize: this isn’t just true for those with dementia—it’s true for all of us. In our conversations, especially the charged ones, it’s less important to be “right” and far more powerful to be present. To understand the other person’s emotions and perspective. This kind of listening asks us to set aside ego and drop into empathy and curiosity—and that is not always easy.

Here are three ways to cultivate egoless, heart-centered listening:

Drop from Head to Heart.
Let your gaze unfocus and imagine your eyeballs gently dropping into your heart space. Imagine your heart as “command central.” Feel its wisdom, its compassion. Let go of the need to be right, and instead ask, “What is this person feeling? What wants to happen?”

Awaken the Right Side of the Throat (Vishuddha Chakra).
This is the receptive, listening aspect of your voice center. Use gentle sound: sing, hum, or tone. Set the intention, “I am heard. I hear others.” Let this intention ripple through your throat and ears. Begin to hear beneath the words, to the heart of what’s being shared.

Energize the Right Side of the Solar Plexus (Manipura Chakra).
This area governs your sense of personal power and flow. Visualize a radiant yellow sun at your solar plexus. Breathe into it, especially into the liver/gallbladder side—the right. Affirm, “I radiate.” Let your presence speak louder than your opinions. Be a calm, steady light.

Authentic listening requires more than hearing words—it calls us to attune to the emotions beneath them. The goal isn’t to be right but to be present and compassionate. By dropping into the heart, activating the receptive side of the throat chakra, and energizing the solar plexus, we can listen more deeply, respond with empathy, and stay grounded in our truth. If the need to be right persists, it’s an invitation to turn inward: explore the sensations beneath the urge, and allow insights to surface. This inner inquiry is a powerful place to begin—and a perfect moment to seek support through soul coaching or Biofield Tuning.